Is Life Pressing Down on You? Give Love a Chance

With the recent passing of David Bowie there have been a lot of posts related to his music and life.  One post that I opened was an Acapella version of the song "Under Pressure" by Queen and Bowie. While listening, the lyrics generated some thoughts:  The song (in my opinion) is about pressure beating down on you.  The response to deal with it was to "turn away"(1) or ignore it or "sit on the fence", indecisive.  The other way to deal with the pressure of life (with people "screaming 'Let me out'") is love.  "keep coming up with love, But it's so slashed and torn".  The word "love" has been misused so it didn't seem appropriate but that is what he kept coming up with...."why, why , why" to this pressure? or why has love been "slashed and torn"?

"Can't we give ourselves one more chance
Why can't we give love that one more chance
Why can't we give love give love give love give love
give love give love give love give love give love"

And why are we not willing to give love one more chance?

"Because love's such an old fashioned word
And love dares you to care for
The people on the edge of the night
And love dares you to change our way of
caring about ourselves"

Love is hard to define.  But consider this:

To say you love one person and not another, is not real love.  It is something else.  In order to love all, which is real love, not fantasy, attracted to, connected or like, then you need to be able to see past the physical and external of a person.  (If you struggle with this, remember, forgiveness is the path to love, and love your enemies doesn't mean you have to like them.)

Love dares us and scares us.   Not the external, surface love, but the deep inside love I believe the song is talking about.   This love is the flame of life and it doesn't change or go out.  And that's what scares us; we're so use to living on the surface in the external, we have forgotten what is beneath the surface.   Also there is guilt because deep down we know the flame is there and we ignore it. 

Is your world pressing down on you? Give love a chance.  It is time for us to have a transformation of the way we look at the world.  Living out in the external or surface has not worked for this world, in life, family, politics, religion, etc. (there is still conflict)  Why not try a better way?  Why not give love a chance?

Ben
© 2016 Ben's Pebble

(1) All quotes are from the lyrics of the "Under Pressure"

 

 

Let Freedom Ring

As part of Martin Luther King Jr. Day, I listened to his "I Have a Dream" speech.  What caught my attention was the word, freedom and "Let freedom ring".   It got me thinking about how often we may celebrate or think about freedom.  We may think of it today as freedom in relation to the civil rights movement and justice.  We may celebrate it on the 4th of July as freedom from tyranny, and for our political and religious freedoms. 

Do we also take some time to think about, or maybe check in on, our own personal freedom?  Are we free?  Have we broken out of our prison cells, and removed the chains of fear, judgment, separation, selfishness, loneliness, neediness, indifference, lack, etc ?

Today I ask, Am I free?  If not, what is keeping me from being free?  A freedom that no country, community, society, religion, enemy or human power can take away or contain?

This freedom rings from all of our souls, thank God!

Ben
© 2016 Ben's Pebble

Goal Goal, Everywhere a Goal

Since the beginning of the year is a popular time to set goals, I thought I would share some thoughts.

As I’m working on my goals, I like to keep the following quote in mind:

“When there is no goal, then there is peace and stillness.  And until one has discovered that, one would go on seeking and searching and wanting and longing because they feel unfulfilled.  I tell you, unfulfillment is not the law of life.  In life there is no lack.  And as long as we know lack, we must have the goal.  Once we have the goal, we must have the conflict within.  These are the deceptions we need to realize the truth of and in so doing you’re religious.”   Tara Singh from audio tape “Simplicity and the Art of Living”

After reading this quote you may think, why would I even have a goal?  As long as I keep it in its proper place, it is ok to have a goal.  But here is the trick: I was about to say, “My number one goal is to have inner peace.  So, if having a goal prevents that, then yes I would not have a goal.”  You may wonder what is wrong with saying this.  Let me add a statement from an audience member in the Tara Sing audio that occurred just before the quote above, “Then the goal is no longer something that needs to be sought after, it’s an inheritance that was only possible in that moment..then it’s gone…..”  My goal of peace, noble as it may be, is conflicted because it is something I’m seeking instead of experiencing it in the moment, and allowing the next moment to be new.

If I have a goal that keeps me searching, seeking and wanting, then I believe I have to attain something instead of realizing that I have everything.

Keeping this perspective separates the goals I may have due to some lack in me, versus a goal that I have from a place of being fulfilled.  As a fulfilled person I may say, “what is calling me?”, versus, “I am miserable and unhappy and my goal is to make more money, get a new job, get in shape because deep down I think having the money, job or health will solve my unhappiness.”

To you who have been given the gift of everything, happy goal setting.

Ben
© 2015 Ben's Pebble

Being Your Best. Are you Shining? Part II

When you are shining, you are naturally giving your best.  Not a predefined idea of what "best" is.  It is not a competitive "best" which is tied to an idea of success and achievement.  "Yeah, but it's a competitive world" you may say.  In shining, you are trusting in Life (God, Spirit, Universe, etc).

I recall having two visions run through my head that dealt with this idea of success and being the best.  Once I was driving by a college and I was thinking if I spoke to these college students I would say something like, "do what you like to do, but no matter what you do strive to be the best".  And then the thought came, Why?  Why do you have to be the best?   This thought surprised me because it was against my thinking as a striver and achiever.  Another time,  I had a dream where my youngest son who went off to college, but then decided to become a boat builder (which isn't what he went to college for), and living the laid back life near the ocean.  He really loved it and in my dream I said to him, "If you want to build boats that's fine, but be the best boat builder".  Which meant my definition of best, grow it, have processes in place, hire people, etc.  Go from two boats a month to ten, etc.  And then the same feeling came, why?  Why does he have to be the best?  Why does anyone have to be someone else's definition of what the best looks like which involves more and more levels of achievement?

If we are shining, we can trust that goodness will happen.  I use the word goodness, so we don't get caught up in the idea of success.  You could feel it means the same thing, but I use it to stay away from the word success. (See, "Are You Shining? Part I")

If you are a parent, even though we may want our kids to have what we think a good life is; a great job and avoid struggle.  But ultimately all we really want is for our children to be happy, at peace and free.  Yet the message many receive is about being the best and successful.      I wonder what the world would look like if the focus was about how to be happy and at peace no matter what happened versus a world focus on getting ahead, striving, achieving and attaining, getting the "right" job.  We often complain about younger generations, but what kind of focus from us did they experience? 

We need a shift in thinking, "be the best" or even "do your best", although appropriate to say at times, is not as important as saying, "you are shining" or "just shine".

You were born to shine.

I wish you the best.   This "best" wish isn't about success, I wish you to be happy, at peace and free no matter where you are at in life. 

Ben

© 2015 Ben's Pebble

Forget Success. Are you Shining? (Part I)

It is time to take a different view of success and the way we think about the word, put it on the shelf awhile, and instead use the word,  "shine".   I have learned over the years that when you're living at your best, you are enjoying the process of whatever you're doing, and not attached to the results.  Yet, we continue to compare ourselves to an idea of achievement, a level of success that is to be attained based on how we happen to view the world.  If we don't achieve it, we feel unsuccessful, depressed, anxious, etc.  Success is a level attained, a comparison, a past moment.  We need to change our thinking from a past or non active state to base success on an active vibrant state, "shining".  Shining is active, it is an every moment of being that you say I'm alive, happy, at peace and free! And in that state you are showing your brilliance or excellence at something (the formal definition of shining), which could just be living or being.  Because the word, success, is commonly used and has certain preconceived notions attached to it, you couldn't use "succeeding" to make it more active.  It wouldn't bring about the kind of transformation we need to break from the chains of success.  Success is more tangible, achievement oriented, past tense.  When someone comments that a person is successful it usually relates to a judgment about the person's status, financial, career, house, etc.   We want to move from this idea of success toward saying, "That person shines".

The truth is, no matter how hard we may try to make success about money, careers,  house, cars, our standing in the community, our kids, how many friends we think we have, our connections, etc., this is not it.  If you have any of these, but are not smiling, not happy, not "shining" what good is it?  We need a shift in thinking from: Am I successful? Am I succeeding? To: Am I shining? Am I lighting up the world?

So, instead of believing thoughts like I'll be successful when....... I become rich, have a nice house, get the job, etc., it becomes a daily, moment to moment living of showing your brilliance, and being happy, at peace, free? Free of attachment to a tangible, physical item or an intangible achievement. 

The beauty of shining is that when you shine, you may be doing so without even knowing it.  Deep inside you're remembering who you are. 

You were born to shine.

Are you shining?

Ben

© 2015 Ben's Pebble

Rise and Shine

“Rise and Shine”, a phrase that often evokes childhood memories of your parents shouting it to you in the morning to encourage you to get out of bed.   It’s a nicer way than yelling “GET OUT OF BED!” or dragging you off your bed.  But the sentiment of “Rise and Shine” is a great way to start your day.  Recently, this saying has taken on additional meaning to me.   To “Rise and Shine” isn’t just about getting up in the morning and starting your day with a smile.   Let’s look at this saying in a new way.    Both of my sons have a shirt from a basketball camp they attended which is called RISE and the back of their shirt has the following:

Reach

Inside

Seek

Excellence

I never gave the back of their shirt much thought until one day a stranger was reading it out loud and with great tonality said “Reach Inside and Seek Excellence…I like that” and then walked away.  “Rise and Shine” starts with Rise and to Rise we begin with Reaching  Inside to Seek that which lifts us up and gets us going whether it be Excellence or something else:

• To reach inside and seek the energy to get out of bed, or seek the energy or effort to do what we need to do.
• To reach inside and seek the courage to face our fears.
• To reach inside and seek forgiveness for ourselves and others.

Or whatever each of us needs to reach inside for, to help us rise; because rise we must…..

When we’re down, We Rise

From the ashes, We Rise

From the darkness of despair and destruction, We Rise

When we hit rock bottom, We Rise

That’s What We Do!

We Rise to get up

We Rise to Shine

And what does it mean to “Shine”?   To be happy, to smile, and live a life of your passion.  When you’re happy and passionate in your life, your work, your home, your community, you are shining and your light impacts the world and helps others shine.  And the spark in you helps ignite the flame in other people. 

Just like Rise, we reach inside to seek that which will help us Shine:

• Reach inside and seek the love and happiness that exist for no reason.
• Reach inside and seek the freedom and peace that comes when we have given up judgment of ourselves and others.
• Reach inside and seek the passion that gives us the energy to shine.
• Reach inside and seek the light in us that is always shining.

Name what you need to reach inside, to help you shine. 

Shine and light up the world.   Now!  It doesn’t matter what happened yesterday, or what might happen tomorrow.   On this day we rise and shine…together!!

Rise and Shine!, Rise and Shine!, Good morning world, let’s Rise and Shine!

Ben

Revised and reposted from a previous post on the old short lived three post Ben's Pebble 

© 2015 Ben's Pebble

Welcome to the start of the BEST YEAR of YOUR LIFE

No, I’m not in the business of predicting the future, and I didn’t secretly find out what New Year resolutions you have made. But I do know the beginning of the year is a time to review our goals, and renew our commitment to our dreams. What better way to start, then believing this can be the best year of your life? Did last year slip by like so many others? Well, now is as good a time as any to ask yourself what you want to accomplish, and what you should do with your life.

Think about what is possible. What would make this the best year of your life? What would make you feel most alive?  The great thing about asking questions is it opens the door for the answers to come to you.  Another important question to ask is, when you get knocked down, tragedy hits or pain and suffering occur, how do you still have the best year of your life?  You will find in the searching and seeking, that the answers to all of these questions are similar. 

Keep in mind, your thoughts determine the world you see.

I don’t know how your year will turn out, that is in your hands. All you need to do right now is believe it is possible, that this can be the best year of your life.

The decision to be happy is yours, Be Happy in this New Year.

Ben

© 2015 Ben's Pebble

Welcome to my new blog, sort of.  I started this blog a few years ago, did three posts and stopped.  I’m starting anew for 2016, a good time to throw pebbles in the sea of life.